Wouldn't you want to know??

I find it shocking how many parents I talk to that don't want to hear unpleasant things about their kid's friends or kids they know.  Yes it is hard sometimes to realize that people are not always as they appear, but come on by the time your 21 you should be jaded enough to know most people are not.  I want to know about my kid's friends, everything, even the unpleasant stuff.  That's the only way I feel I can protect my children from being in situations that are not safe or may not be in their best interest.

If you only want to know the good stuff about the world how do you function.  How do you make decisions on what is good or bad?  I admit all that you hear about someone is probably not true.  However, if you hear the same information or stories over and over that disturb you it should throw up a red flag.  The problem is that many fall into the idea that if a kid or person lives in the right neighborhood, attends the correct schools, dresses  the way lemmings I'm sorry, the way that is deeded acceptable and has good parents they are automatically a great influence for your child to be around. BONG!  WRONG!  I just don't understand how such intelligent adults are so blind. Based on our experience with my son as a teen many times just those "perfect" children are the ones you have to be a little more attentive.  They put on the best act in front of the adults but watch out when they are not under parental supervision, BAM!

The kids with the best backgrounds usually have more drugs, faster cars to crash, and have the money to get into more trouble.  I found this out as a teen and not much has changed, except my parents told me to watch out for those kids not to put them on a pedestal.  I want to know the good, the bad and the ugly about my kids and their friends. Yes it is exhausting,  Yes, it would be easier if I just blocked out all the bad and went through life thinking every thing is clover.  But, to me that wouldn't be living.  It would be a lie.  And I detest liars.

Finally, I find it upsetting and frankly I'm just plain sick of  how kids like my son and others who do not follow the "norm", or can think for themselves are always thrown under the bus.  Some kid that is thought to be all perfect and socially acceptable (according to certain people) can do something horrible.  Say you find they've been driving drunk, doing drugs or beat another kid up just because they can.  It is kept quiet, swept under the rug.  But low and behold a socially unacceptable kid that happens to be from the wrong part of town, or just doesn't follow the other lemmings does the same thing they are then labeled a bad kid, a troublemaker.  Parent's whisper to keep you child away from that kid.  You don't even need to hear the whole story about their situation, just look at them that should tell you everything.

Grr.  I could go on and on, but I will get down off my soap box and fight another day.  Sorry if I stepped on a few toes but I just had to have my say.

Took a small vaca...

I decided to take a small vacation from it all and enjoy what I could of my 40th birthday.  I have to say it was very uneventful.  In fact we did nothing.  I had always thought I would finally have a big celebration for the big four O.  But, due to a major lack in funds it was not meant to be.  I thought 40 would be a bit better than this.  I wouldn't have ever thought I would be practically starting over at 40.  Struggling to make ends meet.  It's been a long, hard year and I hope that it will soon be turning around.  But enough of my brooding and depression.  I will post again another day hopefully in a much better mood.